Another good week

I was down another 2.2lbs. For a total of 14lbs. Feels awesome. I also realize how far I have to go. Only 36 more to hit 50 by Christmas but than I have another 70 to go after that. I don't think about the long range goal very often though. It is a pretty daunting task. I also had a pretty big point day on Saturday. At a McDonald's and than went to eat at my brothers for supper. That was a last minute invite otherwise I would have planned better. But I tracked it and I am moving on. That is going to happen from time to time and I need to learn how to deal. This morning I walked for 70 minutes. I will be glad when the weather is nice so I can walk later in the day. I want to walk after my weight watchers meeting and more often in the evening since Phil is working so early in the morning. Keep marching on. Karen

So angry

My husbands unemployment ran out two weeks ago. Even though I pay most of the bills it was a cushion that was always there. And sometimes I had to use it. We get back from vacation he got one check and blew it and than nothing. He sold some 4 wheelers and gave me 300 of that but that is it. And do you think he is looking for a job. The short answer to that would be no. But I can't say anything about it or be aggravated because then he is mad. I have never been very good at biting my tongue. I don't know what I am suppose to do. What happened to the taking care of me part. Why doesn't he feel like he needs to take care of us. Why didn't he feel the urgency to get a job. It has been 2 years. I got a job within a month of being laid off. Of course, I didn't screw around either. I started sending resumes right away. He has applied to 4 maybe 5 jobs in 2 years. 2 years. I feel like screaming I am so angry. Why does he do this to our family? How can he get away with it? I would feel so guilty yet he makes ME feel guilty. The one who has been working for the last 2 years. Even when he does have money he makes me feel so guilty about asking for it. Than has the gall to ask me where my money is. Lets see I pay for my phone, the electric, car insruance, rent, gas for my car, groceries for all of us, my phone, school lunches, registration, Aarons 2 payments, car. He pays for Dish, his phone, his gas, his cigars. Tell me where this is fair. Granted I was bringing in more money but only 600 a month more. And than I have to try and not being resentful.

People drive me insane

Came in from burning trash and I had a missed call from A. So I call back and leave a message. She leaves me a message asking what I needed. She also tells me what my husband and children are doing. Than has my husband call me to see what I wanted. For the love of all I was only returning her damn call. Wi in tomorrow. I have had quite a few days where I didn't feel in control of myself so I am not expecting much. Just hoping it is on the down ward slope.

Down

At Saturday's WI I was down another 1.8lbs. I was hoping to hit the 10lb mark. Not quite. Maybe this week. I have been feeling really in control lately and I am hoping that continues. I have also been tracking everything. That is a huge thing for me. And seems to be what helped me lose the 70lbs I lost 4 years ago. I have added it up and I have 22 WI's before Christmas. I would like to lose 50lbs by than. Only have 40.2lbs to go. I know I can do this.

Back at it..

This are my most recent pictures. I am praying these can be my "before" pictures. Losing weight that is. I was up to 249.6. Pretty damn close to that 250 mark. I lost 8lbs the first week. Weigh in is Saturday mornings. Hoping that this week will be a good one to. Already feeling alot better. Started walking to. 3-4 times a week is my goal. I would like to lose 50 lbs by Christmas. So, only 42.6 to go.